Monday, September 30, 2019

How to prevent Teenage Pregnancy

Each year the United States is acknowledged for having the highest number of pregnant teens in the industrialized world. We have clueless teenage females of every race having children while they are in high school. Sex is on the minds of so many teenagers that they forget that they are not yet at a stage of having children. Since it is difficult for adolescent girl to resist the temptation of having sex; a while abstinence is the best form of prevention, birth control and other forms of protection are reliable ways to prevent teenage pregnancy. Abstinence is the best and safest way to preventing pregnancy at a young age.Abstinence is avoiding sex or any type of sexual activity. â€Å"If two people don’t have sex, then sperm can’t fertilize an egg and there’s no possibility of a pregnancy†(Hirsch1). â€Å"Only one-third of teen mothers will complete high school†(pike1). Many teenagers have sex before they leave high school catching STDs and becoming pregnant before graduating. Becoming abstinent is one of the best ways for preventing pregnancy because your not doing anything but avoiding peer pressure. Abstinence has a lot of peer pressure but it has a great ending in the long run.â€Å"Peer pressure and things you see on TV and in the movies can make the decision to practice abstinence more difficult†(Hirsch2). Even though it may be difficult for couples to resist having sex due to peer pressure it has its benefits in the end. They have a better chance of not receiving any type of STDs and most important not having children. â€Å"Abstinence is 100% effective in preventing pregnancy. Although many birth control methods can have high rates of success if used properly, they can fail occasionally. Practicing abstinence ensures that a girl won’t become pregnant because there’s no opportunity for sperm to fertilize an egg†(Hirsch1).Even though abstinence is 100% affective not everyone has the ability to resist the powerful peer pressure that comes with it. Birth Control is the next best thing that is accepted by teenage girls. Birth control or contractive pills are pills that are taken orally to help stop the release of an egg every month. â€Å"In simple terms, all methods of birth control are based on either preventing a man‘s sperm from reaching and entering a woman‘s egg (fertilization) or preventing the fertilizes egg from implanting in the woman‘s uterus and starting to grow†(Stoppler1).Birth Control is 99. 9% effective when it comes to preventing teenage pregnancy. However birth control doesn’t permanently stop fertilization after you are on it. The contractive pills may also fail if a teenager was to miss one day of taking the pill after her period. â€Å"If pills are skipped or forgotten, a girl is not protected against pregnancy and she will need a backup form of birth control, such as condoms. Or she will need to stop having sex for a whi le. Do not take a friend’s or relative’s pills† (Hirsch1). Condoms are the most popular way of preventing teenage pregnancy.Condoms block the sperm from fertilizing the egg inside of the female. Condoms have different brands and types for females and males. â€Å"Condoms are absolutely the best birth control for teenagers. They protect against pregnancy and diseases. They are used at the time, so there is no need to fret over whether you forgot to take our pill last Tuesday. They are relatively inexpensive, and easily available (regardless of your age). Both genders can take responsibility for procuring and using them† (Rayne1). These outstanding items work unless someone was to use them the incorrect way.Condoms are made of latex or polyurethane. The best one to choose is the condom made out of latex because they are slightly more reliable. Polyurethane condoms are mostly made out of plastic. â€Å"The most common reason that condoms â€Å"fail† i s that the couple fails to use them at a. Still, it is possible for a condom to break or slip during intercourse. Condoms can also be damaged by things like fingernails and body piercing† (Hirsch2). Condoms are a very reliable source for preventing teenage pregnancy if they would just use them.Even though it may be hard for teenage girls to resist the not having sex; becoming abstinent, using different forms of birth control and condoms are the best way for preventing a unplanned pregnancy. We can stop the United States from having the highest rate of teenage pregnancy each year if the girls will do their part. So many youths have failed to live their life due to the fact that they have had children at a very young age. Having sex can wait, but if they do decide to take the risk of becoming a parent at a very young age, there are always three things they can do to prevent it from happening.

Sunday, September 29, 2019

Information Technology and Health Care Essay

Overview of current and emerging information technology systems and devices that are commonly used by healthcare organizations The utilization of information technology systems and devices in all areas of the work place is expanding. With the advent of the microcomputer, computer use has spread to all areas of work including healthcare organizations. Computer systems in health care facilities today may encompass a network of microcomputers in the future. A primary use of computers in health care is for the documentation of the patient’s data. Today, computer programs that are designed to create patient records abound. These programs allow input of admission data, recording of nursing progress records, development of nursing care plans (both standardized and individualized), documentation of patient teaching completed, scheduling of patients, recording of dietary intake and documentation of medication orders and administration. Some programs are so complete that they have virtually replaced the standard patient chart. The advent of information technology springs from the idea that information superhighway is made available to all people from all walks of life.   All sorts of information are made accessible at the tip of one’s fingers and can be retrieved in a short period of time through the amazing Internet technology, computerized or electronically processed data system. What used to be data, like records or public documents, gathered for weeks or days can now be obtained in minutes or seconds. What used to be information for selected or privileged few intellectuals are now exposed to the public regardless of state, race, ethnical culture, sex or status, not to mention a few restricted information that are confined to certain age levels, or those that are sensitive to security and privacy (Winkler 1997). Potential risks and constraints associated with each of these technology systems 1. The Assessment Process The Assessment process in a healthcare system is highly confidential. All patients have the right to confidentiality. Patient care information such as diagnosis, prognosis and care plans should be kept secret to those not concerned with the patient’s condition. Only authorized individuals should have access to information about a patient.  Ã‚  Ã‚   Medical records must be kept in a secure place where only those authorized to have access can obtain the records. The patient has a right to access his or her own record, and only by obtaining the patient’s permission can records or information be released to others. Agencies are required by state, federal and accrediting rules to have policies by the nurse periodically followed. However, there are potential risks associated with these new technology systems especially in the assessment area. If a smart agent works with a patient in conducting on-line assessment through a wireless phone device, then a potential risk here would be the improper assessment due to a wrong registration of the patient’s voice even if coded repetitively (Dertouzos & Gerschenfeld as qtd in Skiba and Cohen 2003). In the same manner, a constraint here would involve extracting information from the encounter. It is important to remember that the transaction cannot be completed without at least some exchange of intelligence between the patient and another person. These digital systems that collect, analyze and respond to client condition can assess wrongly any information initially given. Even if they are rarely down or suboptimal, still, a patient’s life cannot be entrusted to a technology system no matter how smart it may be. The Assessment process still is an important stage in any healthcare system that needs personal analysis and evaluation. Thus, a foreseeable constraint here is the fact that people may not really use it readily since they would still prefer someone with whom they could talk to in a more relaxed manner.   Leaving the assessment part to any device is not that reliable because it can still malfunction and give a wrong assessment that can send a distressed patient in a more distressed state. The seamless voice recognition may capture the wrong data. Even if the human computer interface uses natural language structure, there is a possibility that the human computer will not know the underlying codification structure (Dertouzos & Gerschenfeld as qtd in Skiba and Cohen 2003). This is the probably constraint that may interfere with the successful implementation of each system. 2. Communications Technology Systems In the area of Communications, being primarily electronic and multidimensional will be a great leap in the future when one can easily communicate with health care professionals using both synchronous and asynchronous communication. (Skiba & Cohen, 2003). According to researches, there are more than 100 nations that are currently engaged in espionage against US companied. Distinctions between global and local are now slowly being eradicated. Company shifts industrial boundaries from the static to the dynamic. The result is global competition of a uniquely unpredictable nature. Enterprises that previously worked hand in hand in different areas may now find themselves at odds with each other, even spying on each other. Since millions of information is readily accessed nowadays, the possibility of disseminating mixed-up, false or misleading information is high. This can be dangerous when used and relied upon for legitimate purposes.   Moreover, some information and data need to be protected and if allowed for public consumption, the parties concerned have to ensure that the information must be updated, reliable and truthful before they are released to the public. The credibility and integrity are at stake at all times if their data are found to be scrupulous, unreliable, and erroneous. Similarly, data bank sources or data controllers must take possible measures to protect the personal data that they are held accountable in viewing such information for unlawful, harmful and questionable purposes (Skiba & Cohen, 2003). 3.   Monitoring process Future gadgets in monitoring for the healthcare system will be state-of –the-art such that smart devices will then be attached to one’s personal Bodynet. This is the term used for the personal network coordinating the devices and both transmit and receive information within the premises of the hospital. It can even be hooked up such that these monitoring devices can reach until the homes of these patients. There will be such a thing as ubiquitous monitoring such that lifestyle factors are monitored too. Even the amount of food in a refrigerator can be monitored making all behaviors and actions available for monitoring purposes. (Skiba & Cohen 2003). Since monitoring can extend beyond hospital walls, the likelihood of information being transferred from one data source to another is highly possible. Smart devices that automatically monitor a patient’s electronic record can provide wrong electronic records. A possible constraint here is the refusal of parties to avail of such devices since it can be restricting. Devices may be available but only the agreeable parties will readily avail of it. Besides, it can be prohibitive in price. The focal point of good risk management is the identification and treatment of these risks, an integral component of any organization’s strategic management. In a healthcare system set-up, the monitoring process can run awry if the devices used in attachments are improperly done. (Stoneburner, G. et al). IT security practitioners assigned to healthcare systems are responsible for proper implementation of security requirements in their IT systems especially in the monitoring process. As changes occur in the existing IT system environment, the IT security practitioners must support or use the risk management process to identify and assess new potential risks and implement new security controls as required to safeguard their IT systems. According to Pamela Matthews, conducting these efficient management researches for the results of patients test will prove to be very helpful in coming up with an effective and technologically advanced solutions that would be the answer to treatment. Conclusion In the final analysis, informatization streamlines troubleshooting of complex systems. Technology today is embedded in and around products in ways that facilitate a steady stream of information about medical transactions and the use to which products and services are put. It is essential that a balance be done on both technology and the health care system where most people prefer a more caring and personalized method. REFERENCES Dertouzos, M. (1998). What will be: How the new world of information will change our lives. New York: HarperEdge. (context link from Skiba & Cohen) Gerschenfeld, N. (2000). When things start to think. New York: Henry Holt & Co. (context link from Skiba & Cohen) Matthews, P. (2000). Leveraging Technology for Success. Journal of Healthcare Information Management Vol. 14 No. 2 . Retrieved Sept. 11, 2006 from http://www.himss.org/asp/ContentRedirector.asp?ContentID=749

Saturday, September 28, 2019

Zumba Fitness Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words

Zumba Fitness - Essay Example Zumba Fitness It has been accepted in most societies due to its flexible programs that can suit the most workers. Zumba fitness has been rated among the Worlds top ten fitness programs based on the number of participants and product uniqueness. Zumba is a dance and aerobics fitness course that was started in the 1990s by Alberto Perez (Perez, 2009). He is from Columbia and started the Zumba program due to his passion for dance and music. The Zumba fitness brand consists of various products launched since 2003. They include Zumba Stape, Zumba Toning, Zumba Sentao, Zumba Kids, Zumba Toning among others. The products cater for various people in the society despite their ages. Since Alberto is a choreographer and a dancer, the fitness program incorporates music in its sessions (Perez, 2009). Zumba uses music genres such as Salsa, Samba, Martial arts, Soca and Hip hop. The different rhythms from the music can be used to change the used approaches. Moreover, the use of different genres ensures that its customers can join the program irrespective of their music preferences. Zumba fitness programs became popular in Columbia and there was a need to cause awareness into other countries (Perez, 2009). With the help of entrepreneurs, the program became international where it has been practiced in more than 180 countries globally. Perez had business ties with the United States; he was able to market his dance into the country. According to recent research, more than 10 million people take weekly classes. Zumbas success has been caused by its use of music and use of infomercials to cause awareness.

Friday, September 27, 2019

Challenging the process Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words

Challenging the process - Essay Example It is the role of the organization leader to recognize this and ensure smooth implementation of the proposed changes (Paton & McCalman, 2008). 2. The leader of the organization should assess the sustainability of the organization in its current state and the benefits of change. If change will make the organization sustainable and the status quo is unsustainable, then the leader should take measures into convincing, and involve the organization’s members in the expected change. 3. The leader creates a vision for the future. This guides the need for change. The organization’s leader then develops a change coalition. This is appropriate to eliminate any resistance to change. It is also important for effective implementation of the new processes. The leader then mobilizes the commitment. Employees and other stakeholders of the organization have to be committed to what the organization intends to achieve. Lastly, the manager leads the change process (Paton & McCalman, 2008). 4. Change processes are initiated for various reasons. Sometimes organizations need to update the system in all the departments and to deal with such a system requires change in certain processes. Sometimes focus is on improving the performance of the organization by adopting a new culture. The organization may have new distribution centers or markets to exploit, requiring changes in its systems (Paton & McCalman,

Thursday, September 26, 2019

Nature of Philosophy Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1500 words

Nature of Philosophy - Essay Example According to Nash (2010), the nature of philosophy is the way people live and view the world. It points out clearly how people live a life without a god. Nash (2010) argues further that philosophy is a way of comprehending the world around us. This implies that its nature includes the ability to view something and interpret it into realities that make sense to us. Philosophy has a vital purpose to us. It helps us apprehend what world view is. We are able to attain a good understanding of our own world views. It guides us to improve our own ways of viewing the world. Philosophy makes us become familiar with world view of others. We are able to know that world views are different. For instance, our world view as students differs with those of Plato and Socrates (Nash 2010). Philosophy has a great response to the ultimate questions in the world. It provides possible solutions to the ultimate causes in the world. It also explains the purpose of existence of human beings. This implies that the study of philosophy will help us comprehend who we are. Finally, it assists us to adapt to our world. Finally, Philosophy plays a major in recognizing people’s values in the world. It does not take sides. Instead, it provides a space for all manner of thinking. It serves the purpose like that of the chief judge in a government. This means that it listens, comprehends and analyzes all circumstances in a given situation. Discussion of the World Views World view contains people’s answers to key questions in life. It is a systematic roadmap with an individual’s beliefs. It has factual views of life and the globe. Many views of the world lack consistency. Therefore, few of them are complete with a systematic steadiness. It is a vital thing to attain a high awareness of world view. World view helps others to understand their own world views. We can also aid them accomplish a systematic and consistent world view. This implies that a world view is a scheme consisting of our fundamental beliefs. Through it, we are able to judge and interpret our realities. It is fundamen tal to note that world view operates in a similar way the eyeglasses work. For instance, the right eyeglass has the capability to put the planet into a clear focal point. Therefore, the world view can also perform the same duty of eyeglass. This also implies that when people view the world imperfectly, reality does not make sense to them. This means that it is of essence to view the world with the right world view framework. It will impact positive consequences on people’s way of thinking and acting (Nash 2010). Components of World View Beliefs about God Any world view has a vital element. A world view differs greatly over basic questions about God. For instance, is there God? What is His nature? Is God a human being? And who created God? These conflicting views result to inconsistent world views. This is because different world view systems have diversified world views concerning God. For instance, the Hinduism and Buddhism differ from the Judaism and Christianity about the beliefs of God. Therefore, the view of God is an important component of World view. Ultimate Reality World view entails of solutions to questions about the universe. For instance, the world view responds to questions like: Who created the world? What is the main purpose of the world? Will the universe be destroyed finally? Is the universe spiritual, material or something different? These questions do not take place in most people. But anyone reading Ronald’s book of ultimate Questions of life will think about them. They will hold beliefs about some of them (2010). Theory of Knowledge People in the world strongly hold to this belief of epistemology. They have different opinions once they are asked about the possibility of the knowledge about the world. They will always provide no and yes answers. Some of the key questions in relation to epistemology are: Can we really trust our own senses? What are the main

Cadez and Guilding (2008) Organization Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1500 words

Cadez and Guilding (2008) Organization - Essay Example Costing a. Attribute Costing b. Life cycle Costing c. Quality Costing d. Target Costing e. Value Chain Costing 2. Planning, control, and performance measurement a. Benchmarking b. Integrated Performance Measurement 3. Strategic Decision Making a. Strategic Costing b. Strategic Pricing c. Brand Valuation 4. Competitor Accounting a. Competitor cost assessment b. Competitive position monitoring c. Competitor performance appraisal 5. Customer Accounting a. Customer Profitability Analysis b. Lifetime Customer Profitability Analysis c. Valuation of Customers as Assets In this paper the strategic management technique of Benchmarking has been presented and defined, along with its benefits for the organisation. Benchmarking and its Benefits for the Organisation: This is the process of comparing ones internal processes with the processes of a company in the same industry, to identify discrepancies. The aim of this activity is to identify the best ways of carrying out a process. When undertakin g this process a company can also analyse the business practices of firms in different industries, and find out what are the key processes in these industries, by doing this a firm can know which processes can be tailored to fit their business model and what are the most effective ways of performing these processes. There are numerous measures which can be assessed in this way, for instance financial parameters, management parameters etch. However the most focused business variables that are subjected to this tool are time, quality and cost (Zairi, 1998). Through the process of benchmarking a company can find out the potential a process carried out by it can achieve. For instance if a competitor is carrying out the same business processes and is achieving a larger output as compared to the company, than there exist some problem with the company’s internal processes. Since the productivity level that can be accomplished is not being accomplished, the company needs to take corr ective measures to raise its productivity (Cooper and Kleinschmidt, 1995). From a competitive point of view, if a company is competing for a order that needs order fulfilment in a lesser amount of time, than the order placing firm will check the production capacity of each of the competing firms. In case a company has remained oblivion to the production capacity of its competitor, who presumably is having a higher production capacity, it can fairly be inferred that the order placing entity will opt for the firm which has greater production capacity. Thus, ever company is obligated to explore the processes of its competitors and other firms in different industry so that it can continually upgrade its own internal processes (Vorhies and Morgan, 2005). After a company decides, which business process it wants to benchmark and how it is going to benchmark it, than it needs to analyse the leader firm in this process and specifically find out how they accomplished such proficiency (David,à ‚  1995). The practice of benchmarking is not an end in itself. It is a part of a bigger initiative, to undertaking business process re-engineering. This process redefines and reconfigures the standard operating procedures of the company’s department or process that is being benchmarked. By doing this the company is trying to neutralise the competitive or process advantage of its competitor firm

Tuesday, September 24, 2019

Challenges of Programming Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

Challenges of Programming - Essay Example Specifically, the subsection on Nonlinear Programming included a discussion of profit graphs with nonproportional relationships. For the subsection on Decision Analysis, different decision criteria were explained. The subsection on Forecasting has a detailed discussion on forecasting techniques. The subsection on Queuing tackled different queuing systems. At the end of every subsection, the author reacts to the issues at hand. Managers can count on a number of quantitative decision making methods that can aid them in coming up with a set of sound judgments as the need arises. These methods include Nonlinear Programming, Decision Analysis, Forecasting, and Queuing. The following subsections will provide a discussion of these methods and the text of Hillier and Hillier (2010) was used extensively. Linear Programming is a subclass of mathematical programming that uses â€Å"straight-line† or linear relationships among the constraints and objective functions (Gass, 2003). The problem falls under Nonlinear programming when at least one of these relationships is nonlinear in nature. Thus, Linear Programming assumes a proportional relationship between activity levels and overall measure of performance while Nonlinear Programming is used to model nonproportional relationships. There are four (4) types of profit graphs associated with nonproportional relationships. First, the Decreasing Marginal Returns wherein the dependent variable increases at a decreasing rate as the dependent variable increases. Second, the Piecewise Linear which consists of a sequence of connected line segments. Third, the graph of Discontinuities which suddenly jumps up or down. Fourth, the Increasing Marginal Returns wherein the dependent variable increases at an increasing rate. Decision Analysis uses a methodological approach to rationally addressing management problems that are much more complicated and display higher levels of uncertainty

Monday, September 23, 2019

Leading and managing people Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1750 words - 2

Leading and managing people - Essay Example In this instance Ross was an effective leader because, he was understanding in the first instance and there and therefore knew the strategies of handling conflict management. The management should understand their staff and ensure they motivated at the first place, development, get inspirations and conflict management to facilitate achievement of organizations goals. This is portrayed in the sociogram that show Ross as an motivating leader. From my understanding and the question, a critical review of leadership and management in this group would involve team building. Firstly, this group lacked the team building techniques. For instance, in a group there exists a variety of personalities with diverse and distinguishing characteristics, skills, requires different kinds of motivation for the achievement of an organizational goal as portrayed in the sociogram. This is shown in the group that portrays Ross as an effective leader. The management should, therefore, understand that they are dealing with different kind of people in the workplace, for example, some are introverts and others extroverts and both should be handled differently depending on their reactions and also try to tame them in conflict management. For our case, this is a group of individuals who are independent and with different abilities, skills, attitudes, temperament among others but they are committed towards the achievement of a common goal and objecti ve. Therefore, it is important for all group members to work for a mutual benefit and goals of an organization. In this case, a leader and not necessarily a manager are required to enable this group. Conflicts that are unavoidable in an organization as a result of various factors should be handled carefully. All the members are entitled to work collectively and collaboratively and be aware of their roles, responsibilities and accountability for their work. For instance in this group, Ross lacked the

Sunday, September 22, 2019

The Enterprise Is Emirates Airlines Assignment Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 3250 words

The Enterprise Is Emirates Airlines - Assignment Example Background Emirates Airlines was established by the Government of United Arab Emirates (UAE) in an agreement with the Pakistan International Airlines (PIA), in May 1985 and the foremost service was started on 25th October, 1985. It is one of the largest airlines of Middle East and recognized as a global player in worldwide airline industry (Cannegieter, 2004). Emirates Airlines had begun their first flight with the destination of Bombay, Delhi (India), Karachi in Pakistan along with Colombo in Sri Lanka and Cairo in Egypt. In 1987, Emirates had started the services with London, Frankfurt and Istanbul. In 1992, the airline company had expanded their services to Djakarta, Rome and Paris. In present days, Emirates Airlines is offering their customers with the domestic, the international and the regional flights. They are serving 53 countries with 75 destinations in the Middle East, Europe, CIS, Africa, Australia and many other regions (Cannegieter, 2004). The Emirates Group holds 40 per cent of stock in the Airlanka. It is an airline company of Sri Lanka. Emirates Airlines has recently made 10 years agreement with Airlanka. This in turn can increase the long-term growth of the company. The organization has made ‘code share’ based agreements with Air Mauritius, ANA, Air India, British Airways, Daallo Airlines, continental Airlines, Finnair, Japan Airlines, Srilankan Airlines and Thai Airway international (Cannegieter, 2004). Emirates Airlines hardly faced economic downturn because the company has set up their centre point in Dubai to get connected with European and Asian countries. Dubai is the ‘City of Gold’ in tourism and commerce and is also known as tax free city for shopping. Many luxurious hotels are also situated their like Burj-Al Arab and other seven star... This essay stresses that organizational culture encompasses the customer satisfaction along with the organizational dedication to the employees because both customer and employee satisfaction are essential factors to gain competency in the market. Adaptability, involvement, mission and consistency are the aspects of Denison Organizational Culture Model This paper makes a conclusion that Emirates Airlines has implemented the organizational culture successfully and through the Denison Model, it can be inferred that motivating the customers and satisfying the employees are the key features of cultural management. From the above context, it can be stated that Emirates Airlines are highly concentrated on the motivating the customer along with analyzing the customer requirements. Emirates Airlines have won many awards for providing high class services. The company has motivated their employees by providing incentives, gratuity payment and bonus. Employees of the Emirates Airlines are secured for the future because the government is providing them with the insurance and pension payment. Customer satisfaction level of Emirates Airline can be judged by the company’s dedication that has been discussed earlier. Emirates Airlines had committed to ensure the customer satisfaction along with the motivation of the employees, this can be on e of the reasons for it to become one of the largest airline companies throughout the world.

Saturday, September 21, 2019

Stereotypes in Modern World Essay Example for Free

Stereotypes in Modern World Essay The stereotype that all is well at the time which exists in our society is one of the most stable. According to this stereotype, the average citizen of Kazakhstan should finish school no later than 18 years old, finish the university at least at the age of 30, to begin his own adult life and leave the parental care at somewhere about 22 years, to start a family and have children in the range of 25 to 35 years old, go to retirement at the age of 58 (women) and 63 (for men). According to this stereotype in Kazakhstan, the daughter should be married and go to live in the house of her husband at 25 years, and the eldest son must always live in his parents’ house even being married. The rest of children –daughters and sons – should also live their parents’ house and live separately. There is another old custom of giving the eldest child to parent for upbringing. But it is used less and less nowadays. Social clock is ticking all the time in collective unconscious in the subconscious of every person. Many women over 25 may have psychological complexes due to, for example, that they are still not married. Young people, not enrolled to study in high school, worry about that they will not have enough time to get higher education until they are 30. Maybe all this stereotypes have some biological reasons related with philosophy: the most optimal time for the first childbearing for women is the age before 30. After this age the childbearing can pass with some complications. Young parents have more chances to bring up their offspring and to see their grandchildren, and be involved in their education. And parents will not burden their adult children with the care of themselves (parents), when it’s a time for them (children) to make a career. In addition, they will be born healthier children. Scientists have shown that the older parents have more chances to have children born with Down syndrome. At last it is not very good to stay under the roof of paternal house, because it is fraught with possible conflicts of generations. But it also happens that people are pleased to break stereotypes. And then we find out in the news that the 80-year-old man became a student at the university; or that an elderly woman in retirement, because of her love to music, went to the music school to fulfill the dream of her lifetime –to learn to play the piano. Perhaps previously she had no time to do that, because she had to make a living and raise a family. More often modern Kazakh girls break stereotypes. They are not in hurry to get married and put it off to times up to 40 years, because they want to get married not for public opinion, but in case of real love. They know all the risks, but hope for the best, and often their expectations are met. If you want to know my opinion I would say that I’m strongly against any stereotypes imposed by social clock, and I think that everyone should tune this clock according to their own opinion and write the script of their lives themselves. Writer and philosopher Voltaire once said, â€Å"Best of all to do things, that in the opinion of others, you will never be able to do. And I absolutely agree with that!

Friday, September 20, 2019

A Research Paper on IFRS and Its Implications

A Research Paper on IFRS and Its Implications International Financial Reporting Standards (IFRS) is a comprehensive, globally accepted set of accounting standards utilizing a principles-based approach with a greater emphasis on interpretation and application of those principles, aiming at best reflecting the economic substance of transactions. It is a less extensive body of literature than U.S. GAAP with limited industry guidance and lesser detailed application guidance. IFRS requires a much greater exercise of judgement, supported by detailed analysis and documentation. In other words, U.S. GAAP gives us a detailed instruction to the location where we would like to go where us IFRS will just guide us to the destination by showing us the direction. Today, more than 40% of the Global Fortune 500 are using IFRS. Stock exchanges in the 85 countries that require IFRS comprise 35% of the global market capitalization, compared to 25% of the global market capitalization held by U.S. exchanges  [1]  . IFRS is most likely to become mandatory by beginning of 2014. Why IFRS? The question facing companies is not If to adopt IFRS, it is of when and how to adopt IFRS. With so many companies focused on managing through the economic downturn, few leadership teams are eager for one more big thing to do. Especially when that thing involves something as pervasive as International Financial Reporting Standards (IFRS). But IFRS continues to be adopted by jurisdictions around the world. Taking the organization to IFRS will require managing change in multiple areas: technical accounting and tax, internal controls and processes, management and statutory reporting, technology infrastructure, and organizational issues. Theyre all interconnected, which makes things a bit more complicated than imagined. IFRS relies more on general principles than detailed rules and bright lines. This means that the finance people will end up working much more closely with others in the organization to make judgments about accounting based on the underlying economics of transactions. A flurry of operational changes could be triggered by IFRS as well. Companies may have to re-examine contracts and debt agreements, treasury policies, employee benefits, education and training, and communications. Opportunities to centralize statutory accounting functions into shared service centers might also have to be looked at. A revisit of the offshoring, outsourcing, and tax planning decisions might also be required. Principle or Rule Based? At a global symposium held in the month of January where the Peter Wyman, a partner of PwC noticed a sea change in the debate surrounding the adoption of a uniform international accounting standard. The feeling was that IFRS will be adopted across the globe, the issues which were present were only of how it was to be done. There have been primarily been two major approaches to accounting namely rule based and principal based. UK and Europe have a principal based accounting system which allows greater discretion and use of professional judgement. On the other hand, US has been following rule based accounting system which was further strengthened after seeing the light of scandals such as Enron, etc. The major challenge for International Accounting Standards Board (IASB) is to adapt IFRS so that it is agreeable to all the parties involved. ACCAs head of financial reporting believes that the use of principles-based approach should be the way forward as principles is a more practical way of pushing standards across the globe. The six accountancy firms which used the symposium to showcase their whitepapers expressed that principle based will limit the size and complexity of the rule book. View from the US According to the director of Financial Accounting Standards Board (FASB), due to the scandals it has become necessary to ensure that regulators dont apply unfair pressure on the people who prepare the accounts. This has led to the development of a culture of Second Guessing which the rule based approach tries to rectify, making it an extended rulebook. The enforcement is also talked of as a problem because Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) does not hesitate to criticize, but empirical data shows that out of the restatement of accounts which were ordered by SEC, very few companies share price showed any movement. View of the Users What the users want is principles based approach because the aim of the financial reports and statements is to give a clear view of the way the company is run and its future prospects for success. Investors are worried that US may influence the new IFRS regime too much and create principles having unending exceptions, clarifications and rules. IASB is consulting all the stakeholders and hearing out the point of view of each one of them. They assure the investors that no party will be able to influence any decision and that they would like to hear to all sides of view before taking any decision. All of the following points towards the steady adoption of IFRS. The greatest danger will be that of to please all the stakeholders. It would be interesting to note what substance US wants to put in the rulebook as US has agreed to adopt IFRS. Benefits From a macroeconomic perspective, the benefits of using one global financial reporting language are evident: increased comparability across global investment options, fewer barriers of entry to non-US markets, and potentially, a lower cost of capital. Moving to a single global accounting and reporting language will also reduce complexity a welcome improvement for the companies that prepare financial reports and for the investors and other stakeholders who rely on them. From a capital markets perspective, many multinational companies believe that IFRS offers an opportunity to lower their cost of capital. Widespread acceptance of IFRS financial statements allows companies to seek capital across a broad base of global funding without having to incur additional-financial reporting costs based on the source of funding. Anticipating increased competition among global investors and financers for attractive investments, strong companies expect their cost of capital to decrease. Because of conversion of major capital markets to IFRS is relatively young, it is too soon to tell whether the decrease in anticipated cost of capital will prove out. However due to the sheer size of most capital raising efforts and long term nature of the payoff, even slight improvements in transaction terms such as interest rates can translate into significant dollar savings. Within individual companies, the ability to centralize and streamline accounting functions and move financial personnel freely around the world will lower costs and strength internal controls. Today multinational corporations with numerous statutory filing requirements around the world need to employ staff with expertise in each national GAAP to prepare filings and then translate financial statements from National GAAP to the parent-company GAAP. Use of IFRS will reduce these reporting efforts and related costs and decrease the risk of errors. IFRS Implementation The change of financial reporting standard is just not of moving from one standard to another, rather it will influence the way in which financial information is shared throughout the organisation. Thus it tells that it will take not just a few weeks before the deadline, it would require significant time and commitment from the management to make the change. Collection of data to prepare the financial reports needed for IFRS will be a very big challenge as the data which will need to be collected has to be reliable and has to be subject to sufficient level of control to be taken as a reportable data. This article talks about two separate but related approaches which needs to operate so as to make the process an effective one: A top down definition of the IFRS reporting requirement where in a thorough understanding of the accounting policies and associated data requirements required to achieve IFRS-compliant financial reporting. This will help develop financial reports early in the conversion process and would help identify the gaps in the available data. A bottom up review at the business unit level of the precise impact of IFRS requirements on individual business processes and financial systems. This would make sure if the reporting requirements could be possible with the right level and quality of information within an acceptable time period. Implementation  [2]   Phase 1: Preliminary study-During this phase, companies perform a broad-based assessment of the impact of IFRS on financial reporting, long-term contracts, supporting business processes, systems and controls, and income tax compliance, planning and reporting. They also determine a strategy for the road ahead. Phase 2: Initial conversion-This phase includes much of the legwork of a conversion effort-setting up and launching the project, thoroughly evaluating the IFRS and US GAAP differences for specific financial statement line items, evaluating accounting policy alternatives, selecting IFRS accounting policies, performing the initial conversion, and creating IFRS financial statements during the dual reporting period. In-depth assessments of operational issues, such as the IFRS impact on significant business contracts (e.g., financing, leasing, joint venture agreements), and income tax compliance and reporting issues also take place during initial conversion. Stakeholder communication should be a constant consideration throughout this phase. Phase 3: Integrate change-Critical to the conversion process is incorporating IFRS changes into the day-to-day operations, processes, and systems of the business (known as embedding). This phase helps to ensure a smooth transition to the new reporting framework so the company can use its new IFRS language on a sustainable basis in a well-controlled environment as of the IFRS adoption date. The role of professional judgment Although many accounting policies will be derived directly from IFRS standards and interpretations, the appropriate way to apply those standards or interpretations might not be obvious in all cases. Because IFRS is less prescriptive than US GAAP, there may be a wider range of acceptability under IFRS in certain areas. Therefore, sound, well-documented professional judgment becomes especially important in an IFRS reporting environment. Management will need to exercise judgment to develop and apply accounting policies that faithfully present the economics of transactions and are decision-useful to the readers of the financial statements. Selection of the most appropriate accounting policies is a critical step, since that decision will impact the company for the foreseeable future. Continual dialogue with the companys independent accountants will leverage their IFRS expertise and ensure that, in principle, they agree with the companys new financial reporting policies. The independent accountants will also want to understand any related changes to internal controls and ensure that the changes are auditable. Keeping independent accountants involved in a timely manner will avoid potential pitfalls later in the conversion process. Implementation Issues Companies beginning to scope their IFRS conversions are often surprised by the volume of disclosures, and how different they are from their national GAAP  [3]  . The data which is required by IFRS is not being collected, even if it is collected; the amount of data being collected is insufficient. According to an executive of BASDA, IFRS will hardly require any changes to the back office systems, whatever changes will be required would be on the reporting side as IFRS according to him focuses on reports. Organisations using Enterprise Resource Planning systems to prepare management accounts will be in a better position to the ones which use different systems for each office or business unit. Recalibration of ERP systems will be relatively easy than to upgrade legacy systems. One of the biggest barriers to conversion identified by a survey conducted by PWC was the alignment of internal reporting systems with the external reporting systems. Looking at IFRS as only a change in reporting could turn out to be very expensive rework for the organisation at a later date. The extent of changes which might be required will depend on the size of the business, the number of applications collecting financial data and the capabilities of the current applications. IFRS implementation could provide a good opportunity for firms to streamline their reporting systems and could provide a good platform for making strategic improvements in the systems, processes and controls. As a lot of vendors have solutions for IFRS, technology will greatly help as an enabler for IFRS. It will also provide a great cost saving opportunity due to standardisation, improved communication, improved controls and better cash management. It concludes by telling us that technology change should not be underestimated and it will be critical for the firm to address the technology point of view early in the process as changes in the systems must be sustained along with a detailed understanding of the new accounting language. Impact of IFRS Convergence to IFRS will greatly enhance an Indian entities ability to raise and attract foreign capital at a low cost. A common accounting language, such as IFRS, will help Indian companies benchmark their performance with global counterparts. There will be escape from multiple reports for global Indian companies that have to prepare their financial statements under multiple GAAPs. With the knowledge of IFRS, the Indian Chartered Accountant would be globally acceptable. Experience has shown that the conversion from Indian GAAP to IFRS requires significant efforts. The preparers, users and auditors continue to encounter practical implementation challenges. Conversion to IFRS is more than a mere technical exercise. The consequences are far wider than financial reporting issues and extend to various significant business and regulatory matters including compliance with debt covenants, structuring of ESOP schemes, training of employees, modification of IT systems and tax planning. Companies also need to communicate the impact of IFRS convergence to their investors to ensure they understand the shift from Indian GAAP to IFRS. IFRS and India As the capital markets become increasingly global in nature, more and more investors see the need for a common set of international accounting standards. About 109 countries presently require or permit use of IFRS in preparation of financial statements in their countries. By 2011, the number is expected to reach 150. In India ICAI has issued a document titled Concept paper on convergence with IFRS in India to evaluate the need for Indian GAAP to change to IFRS. In the paper, the ICAI notes that as the world globalises, it has become imperative for India to make a formal strategy for convergence with IFRS with the objective of harmonise with globally accepted accounting standards. Keeping in view of the complex nature of IFRS, the ICAI in its concept paper has expressed the view that IFRS should be adopted for the public interest entities, banks and insurance entities and large sized entities from the accounting periods beginning on or after 1st April, 2011. The countries which have adopted IFRS have done so for similar type of entities. A few illustrative examples of fundamental changes that can impact wider business considerations have been discussed below. A comparison between IFRS Indian GAAP Let us now take a look at a few illustrative examples of the differences between IFRS and Indian GAAP Revenue Recognition IFRS and Indian GAAP are broadly based on similar principles. IFRS provides more detailed guidance on recognition and measurement of revenue; whereas Indian GAAP is a basic recognition standard. In absence of comprehensive guidance under Indian GAAP, varied practices are being followed by corporate entities based on either legal form or substance of the transaction or past practices. An example would be the guidance on multiple-deliverable contracts especially on the determination of when transactions with multiple deliverables should be separated into components and with the way revenue gets allocated to the different components and focuses on economic substance of the transaction. It also requires revenue to be measured at the fair value of the consideration received or receivable. Consolidation Under IFRS, a parent is required to present consolidated financial statements, with limited exception, and presents a standalone financial statements only for a specific purpose. In comparison, Indian GAAP requires use of the consolidation standard when consolidation financial statements are prepared. Under IFRS, the conclusion regarding whether or not to consolidate is premised on the power of a company has to govern the financial and operating policies of another, with consideration of risks and rewards where control is not apparent. In comparison, Indian GAAP follows a simple approach and requires consolidation if the parent entity has majority of voting rights or control over the composition of the board of directors of governing body. Financial Instruments IFRS provides extensive guidance on identification, classification, recognition and measurement of financial instruments. In addition, it provides guidance on derecognition of financial instruments, hedge accounting and has extensive disclosure requirements. At present there is no comprehensive guidance on financial instruments under Indian GAAP, however, the ICAI has approved introduction of standards on financial instruments under Indian GAAP. However, the ICAI has approved introduction of standards of financial instruments similar to IFRS effective from 1st April, 2011. This will bring a fundamental shift from historical cost to fair value accounting resulting in potentially more volatility in the income statement. Certain difference within the financial liabilities and equity arenas are so significant that they may impact how a company choses to finance its operations. Some financial instruments considered as equity under Indian GAAP will need to be treated as debt when classification of these instruments as debt will not impact net assets and debt to equity relationships, but will also result in increased interest expense. Others The move to IFRS will provide extensive guidance and lead to fundamental change in many other areas, such as share-based payments or a change in accounting policy. For Example, a change in accounting policy will no longer be discretionary. Change to a new accounting policy, with limited exception, will be applied retrospectively with restatement of prior period financials. Conclusion We understand that implementing IFRS is imperative for any organization. The earlier organizations recognise the need, opportunities and threats posed, the more beneficial it would be for the organization. By gathering the insight of people who have already experienced IFRS conversions and using tested, proven methods, a company can better focus its efforts. And by keeping abreast of the developing IFRS environment and utilizing the most up-to-date information and advisors, a company can avoid many of the pitfalls that plagued others in the past.

Thursday, September 19, 2019

Skecthing Gustave Calliebotte’s Paris Street; Rainy Day Essay -- Infor

Skecthing Gustave Calliebotte’s Paris Street; Rainy Day I can smell the rain on my jacket as my fingers numbly make their way across the pad, trying their best to capture an instant in time on a piece of yellow, college-ruled, notebook paper, despite my now apparent lack of artistic ability. As I am watching the scene unfold, I hardly notice the people walking around me, gazing at the same thing I am, before they move on. Cuddling under an umbrella, a man and his wife are casually strolling through the light fog. Their attention is caught by something off to their right, so he does not notice when his top hat is almost bumped to one side by the umbrella as another pedestrian tries to pass on the narrow sidewalk. Further off in the distance, several other sets of people can be seen composedly walking through the gentle mist of rain. It seems as though they are not even aware of the weather as they make their way from shop to shop, content on this comfortable evening. To my left, a couple of gentlemen are discussing their affairs as they mo ve past a horse-drawn carriage. The pudd...

Wednesday, September 18, 2019

Cloning - Ethics or Life? Essay examples -- Argumentative Persuasive

Cloning: Ethnics or Life? Â   Â   Walking into a small hospital room you notice two small boys. As you observe the diagnostic papers on the young boys' bedposts you suddenly become guilt stricken. The darker haired boy on the right has liver cancer, but thankfully there is hope for this young boy, since he is on a very efficient liver donor program. In two days, Sam, as we will call him, will be receiving a clean and pure liver that will grant him a life as normal and healthy as any other young man. On the other hand the boy in the adjacent small, white hospital bed is not so lucky. We'll call this boy William. William is suffering from a spinal cord injury that occurred in a motor vehicle accident a few days earlier. This injury left William paralyzed and slowly he will deteriorate and die, while his family and friends wait and watch helplessly. Life is not out of the question for young William though, but the technology and science that will save his life is illegal in the United States. The knowledge and abil ity to clone a new spinal cord for William and send him too on his way to a normal life is there, but the ability to access this new science is not. So you play god for a moment and tell this young kid's parents why their son must die while his new friend in the bed next to him will live. Â   Cloning is a process in which one or more individual plants or animals are produced that are genetically identical to another plant or animal (Robinson 2). Cloning has been used since the late 1970's, and was designed to take genetically "perfect" animals and clone them to produce better food for humans (Robinson 3). The idea and wonder always was there, though, of weather we should and could clone a human being. This issue of... ...and Re-Engineering. [online] available: http://cac.psu.edu/ ~gsg109 / qs/ em01003.html. February/29/1996 Brush, Dr. P. "Ethical Concerns" Human Cloning and Re-Engineering. [online] available: http://cac.psu.edu/ ~gsg109/qs/em 01005.html. February/26/1996 "Can and Should We Clone Humans", [online] available: http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~mchorost/e306/cloning.htm. ] December/3/2000 Contran, R. "Cancer Resource Center" Welcome to the American cancer Society's Cancer Resource Center [online] available: http://www.cancer.org/cancerinfo/load_cont.asp?ct=1&doc=3&language=english March/24/2000 "Excite Health Center" Cancer [online] available: http://adam.excite.com/ info/?id=001289. December/14/2000 Robinson, Bruce A. "What is cloning?" Ethical Aspects of Human Cloning. [online] available: http://www.religioustolerance.org/cloning.htm#what. October/12/1997

Tuesday, September 17, 2019

Diffusion of Technology in Society Essay -- essays research papers

Successful and Inappropriate Diffusion In Thermador The Thermadorian society had been isolated from the world for hundreds of years. The successful diffusion of farming technology failed for a number of reasons. Based on our information, there were several components missing. Components such as no research or plans to sustain a long-term solution to the problem. The United Nations presented modern farming technology not taking into consideration the educational level of the society in a modern world. Technology changes society, however it is gradual and consistent. It could be assumed that the Thermadorians had no concept of the change and had no understanding of the role of the technology provided. The United Nations provided the Thermadorians with tractors and other heavy vehicles to assist the farmers in the planting of the seeds and harvesting crops. It appears the United Nations did not research or even attempt to understand the Thermadorian culture, customs, or addressing their economy or governmental structure. There is no information on the social status and who had control of the land. Did the would-be farmers have standing in their societal structure? Were they poor/rich? Small farms as opposed to large? Nothing is noted so assuming they are simple people with little education and no experience relating to the farming technology provided. No representative living amongst the Thermadorians. Without taking into consideration thei...

Bag of Bones CHAPTER SIX

On July 3rd of 1998, I threw two suitcases and my Powerbook in the trunk of my mid-sized Chevrolet, started to back down the driveway, then stopped and went into the house again. It felt empty and somehow forlorn, like a faithful lover who has been dropped and cannot understand why. The furniture wasn't covered and the power was still on (I understood that The Great Lake Experiment might turn out to be a swift and total failure), but 14 Benton Street felt deserted, all the same. Rooms too full of furniture to echo still did when I walked through them, and everywhere there seemed to be too much dusty light. In my study, the VDT was hooded like an executioner against the dust. I knelt before it and opened one of the desk drawers. Inside were four reams of paper. I took one, started away with it under my arm, then had a second thought and turned back. I had put that provocative photo of Jo in her swimsuit in the wide center drawer. Now I took it, tore the paper wrapping from the end of the ream of paper, and slid the photo halfway in, like a bookmark. If I did perchance begin to write again, and if the writing marched, I would meet Johanna right around page two hundred and fifty. I left the house, locked the back door, got into my car, and drove away. I have never been back. I'd been tempted to go down to the lake and check out the work which turned out to be quite a bit more extensive than Bill Dean had originally expected on several occasions. What kept me away was a feeling, never quite articulated by my conscious mind but still very powerful, that I wasn't supposed to do it that way; that when I next came to Sara, it should be to unpack and stay. Bill hired out Kenny Auster to shingle the roof, and got Kenny's cousin, Timmy Larribee, to ‘scrape the old girl down,' a cleansing process akin to pot-scrubbing that is sometimes employed with log homes. Bill also had a plumber in to check out the pipes, and got my okay to replace some of the older plumbing and the well-pump. Bill fussed about all these expenses over the telephone; I let him. When it comes to fifth- or sixth-generation Yankees and the expenditure of money, you might as well just stand back and let them get it out of their systems. Laying out the green just seems wrong to a Yankee, somehow, like petting in public. As for myself, I didn't mind the outgo a bit. I live frugally, for the most part, not out of any moral code but because my imagination, very lively in most other respects, doesn't work very well on the subject of money. My idea of a spree is three days in Boston, a Red Sox game, a trip to Tower Records and Video, plus a visit to the Wordsworth bookstore in Cambridge. Living like that doesn't make much of a dent in the interest, let alone the principal; I had a good money manager down in Waterville, and on the day I locked the door of the Derry house and headed west to TR-90, I was worth slightly over five million dollars. Not much compared to Bill Gates, but big numbers for this area, and I could afford to be cheerful about the high cost of house repairs. That was a strange late spring and early summer for me. What I did mostly was wait, close up my town affairs, talk to Bill Dean when he called with the latest round of problems, and try not to think. I did the Publishers Weekly interview, and when the interviewer asked me if I'd had any trouble getting back to work ‘in the wake of my bereavement,' I said no with an absolutely straight face. Why not? It was true. My troubles hadn't started until I'd finished All the Way from the Top; until then, I had been going on like gangbusters. In mid-June, I met Frank Arlen for lunch at the Starlite Cafe. The Starlite is in Lewiston, which is the geographical midpoint between his town and mine. Over dessert (the Starlite's famous strawberry shortcake), Frank asked if I was seeing anyone. I looked at him with surprise. ‘What are you gaping at?' he asked, his face registering one of the nine hundred unnamed emotions this one of those somewhere between amusement and irritation. ‘I certainly wouldn't think of it as two-timing Jo. She'll have been dead four years come August.' ‘No,' I said. ‘I'm not seeing anybody.' He looked at me silently. I looked back for a few seconds, then started fiddling my spoon through the whipped cream on top of my shortcake. The biscuits were still warm from the oven, and the cream was melting. It made me think of that silly old song about how someone left the cake out in the rain. ‘Have you seen anybody, Mike?' ‘I'm not sure that's any business of yours.' ‘Oh for Christ's sake. On your vacation? Did you ‘ I made myself look up from the melting whipped cream. ‘No,' I said. ‘I did not.' He was silent for another moment or two. I thought he was getting ready to move on to another topic. That would have been fine with me. Instead, he came right out and asked me if I had been laid at all since Johanna died. He would have accepted a lie on that subject even if he didn't entirely believe it men lie about sex all the time. But I told the truth . . . and with a certain perverse pleasure. ‘No.' ‘Not a single time?' ‘Not a single time.' ‘What about a massage parlor? You know, to at least get a ‘ ‘No.' He sat there tapping his spoon against the rim of the bowl with his dessert in it. He hadn't taken a single bite. He was looking at me as though I were some new and oogy specimen of bug. I didn't like it much, but I suppose I understood it. I had been close to what is these days called ‘a relationship' on two occasions, neither of them on Key Largo, where I had observed roughly two thousand pretty women walking around dressed in only a stitch and a promise. Once it had been a red-haired waitress, Kelli, at a restaurant out on the Extension where I often had lunch. After awhile we got talking, joking around, and then there started to be some of that eye-contact, you know the kind I'm talking about, looks that go on just a little too long. I started to notice her legs, and the way her uniform pulled against her hip when she turned, and she noticed me noticing. And there was a woman at Nu You, the place where I used to work out. A tall woman who favored pink jog-bras and black bike shorts. Quite yummy. Also, I liked the stuff she brought to read while she pedalled one of the stationary bikes on those endless aerobic trips to nowhere not Mademoiselle or Cosmo, but novels by people like John Irving and Ellen Gilchrist. I like people who read actual books, and not just because I once wrote them myself. Book-readers are just as willing as anyone else to start out with the weather, but as a general rule they can actually go on from there. The name of the blonde in the pink tops and black shorts was Adria Bundy. We started talking about books as we pedalled side by side ever deeper into nowhere, and there came a point where I was spotting her one or two mornings a week in the weight room. There's something oddly intimate about spotting. The prone position of the lifter is part of it, I suppose (especially when the lifter is a woman), but not all or even most of it. Mostly it's the dependence factor. Although it hardly ever comes to that point, the lifter is trusting the spotter with his or her life. And, at some point in the winter of 1996, those looks started as she lay on the bench and I stood over her, looking into her upside-down face. The ones that go on just a little too long. Kelli was around thirty, Adria perhaps a little younger. Kelli was divorced, Adria never married. In neither case would I have been robbing the cradle, and I think either would have been happy to go to bed with me on a provisional basis. Kind of a honey-bump test-drive. Yet what I did in Kelli's case was to find a different restaurant to eat my lunch at, and when the YMCA sent me a free exercise-tryout offer, I took them up on it and just never went back to Nu You. I remember walking past Adria Bundy one day on the street six months or so after I made the change, and although I said hi, I made sure not to see her puzzled, slightly hurt gaze. In a purely physical way I wanted them both (in fact, I seem to remember a dream in which I had them both, in the same bed and at the same time), and yet I wanted neither. Part of it was my inability to write my life was quite fucked up enough, thank you, without adding any additional complications. Part of it was the work involved in making sure that the woman who is returning your glances is interested in you and not your rather extravagant bank account. Most of it, I think, was that there was just too much Jo still in my head and heart. There was no room for anyone else, even after four years. It was sorrow like cholesterol, and if you think that's funny or weird, be grateful. ‘What about friends?' Frank asked, at last beginning to eat his strawberry shortcake. ‘You've got friends you see, don't you?' ‘Yes,' I said. ‘Plenty of friends.' Which was a lie, but I did have lots of crosswords to do, lots of books to read, and lots of movies to watch on my VCR at night; I could practically recite the FBI warning about unlawful copying by heart. When it came to real live people, the only ones I called when I got ready to leave Derry were my doctor and my dentist, and most of the mail I sent out that June consisted of change-of address cards to magazines like Harper's and National Geographic. ‘Frank,' I said, ‘you sound like a Jewish mother.' ‘Sometimes when I'm with you feel like a Jewish mother,' he said. ‘One who believes in the curative powers of baked potatoes instead of matzo balls. You look better than you have in a long time, finally put on some weight, I think ‘ ‘Too much.' ‘Bullshit, you looked like Ichabod Crane when you came for Christmas. Also, you've got some sun on your face and arms.' ‘I've been walking a lot.' ‘So you look better . . . except for your eyes. Sometimes you get this look in your eyes, and I worry about you every time I see it. I think Jo would be glad someone's worrying.' ‘What look is that?' I asked. ‘Your basic thousand-yard stare. Want the truth? You look like someone who's caught on something and can't get loose.' I left Derry at three-thirty, stopped in Rumford for supper, then drove slowly on through the rising hills of western Maine as the sun lowered. I had planned my times of departure and arrival carefully, if not quite consciously, and as I passed out of Motton and into the unincorporated township of TR-90, I became aware of the heavy way my heart was beating. There was sweat on my face and arms in spite of the car's air conditioning. Nothing on the radio sounded right, all the music like screaming, and I turned it off. I was scared, and had good reason to be. Even setting aside the peculiar cross-pollination between the dreams and things in the real world (as I was able to do quite easily, dismissing the cut on my hand and the sunflowers growing through the boards of the back stoop as either coincidence or so much psychic fluff), I had reason to be scared. Because they hadn't been ordinary dreams, and my decision to go back to the lake after all this time hadn't been an ordinary decision. I didn't feel like a modern fin-de-mill? ¦naire man on a spiritual quest to face his fears (I'm okay, you're okay, let's all have an emotional circle-jerk while William Ackerman plays softly in the background); I felt more like some crazy Old Testament prophet going out into the desert to live on locusts and alkali water because God had summoned him in a dream. I was in trouble, my life was a moderate-going-on-severe mess, and not being able to write was only part of it. I wasn't raping kids or running around Times Square preaching conspiracy theories through a bullhorn, but I was in trouble just the same. I had lost my place in things and couldn't find it again. No surprise there; after all, life's not a book. What I was engaging in on that hot July evening was self-induced shock therapy, and give me at least this much credit I knew it. You come to Dark Score this way: 1-95 from Derry to Newport; Route 2 from Newport to Bethel (with a stop in Rumford, which used to stink like hell's front porch until the paper-driven economy pretty much ground to a halt during Reagan's second term); Route 5 from Bethel to Waterford. Then you take Route 68, the old County Road, across Castle View, through Motton (where downtown consists of a converted barn which sells videos, beer, and second-hand rifles), and then past the sign which reads TR-90 and the one reading GAME WARDEN IS BEST ASSISTANCE IN EMERGENCY, DIAL 1-800-555-GAME OR * 72 ON CELLULAR PHONE. To this, in spray paint, someone has added FUCK THE EAGLES. Five miles past that sign, you come to a narrow lane on the right, marked only by a square of tin with the faded number 42 on it. Above this, like umlauts, are a couple of. 22 holes. I turned into this lane just about when I had expected to it was 7:16 P.M., EDT, by the clock on the Chevrolet's dashboard. And the feeling was coming home. I drove in two tenths of a mile by the odometer, listening to the grass which crowned the lane whickering against the undercarriage of my car, listening to the occasional branch which scraped across the roof or knocked on the passenger side like a fist. At last I parked and turned the engine off. I got out, walked to the rear of the car, lay down on my belly, and began pulling all of the grass which touched the Chevy's hot exhaust system. It had been a dry summer, and it was best to take precautions. I had come at this exact hour in order to replicate my dreams, hoping for some further insight into them or for an idea of what to do next. What I had not come to do was start a forest fire. Once this was done I stood up and looked around. The crickets sang, as they had in my dreams, and the trees huddled close on either side of the lane, as they always did in my dreams. Overhead, the sky was a fading strip of blue. I set off, walking up the right hand wheelrut. Jo and I had had one neighbor at this end of the road, old Lars Washburn, but now Lars's driveway was overgrown with juniper bushes and blocked by a rusty length of chain. Nailed to a tree on the left of the chain was NO TRESPASSING. Nailed to one on the right was NEXT CENTURY REAL ESTATE, and a local number. The words were faded and hard to read in the growing gloom. I walked on, once more conscious of my heavily beating heart and of the way the mosquitoes were buzzing around my face and arms. Their peak season was past, but I was sweating a lot, and that's a smell they like. It must remind them of blood. Just how scared was I as I approached Sara Laughs? I don't remember. I suspect that fright, like pain, is one of those things that slip our minds once they have passed. What I do remember is a feeling I'd had before when I was down here, especially when I was walking this road by myself. It was a sense that reality was thin. I think it is thin, you know, thin as lake ice after a thaw, and we fill our lives with noise and light and motion to hide that thinness from ourselves. But in places like Lane Forty-two, you find that all the smoke and mirrors have been removed. What's left is the sound of crickets and the sight of green leaves darkening toward black; branches that make shapes like faces; the sound of your heart in your chest, the beat of the blood against the backs of your eyes, and the look of the sky as the day's blue blood runs out of its cheek. What comes in when daylight leaves is a kind of certainty: that beneath the skin there is a secret, some mystery both black and bright. You feel this mystery in every breath, you see it in every shadow, you expect to plunge into it at every turn of a step. It is here; you slip across it on a kind of breathless curve like a skater turning for home. I stopped for a moment about half a mile south of where I'd left the car, and still half a mile north of the driveway. Here the road curves sharply, and on the right is an open field which slants steeply down toward the lake. Tidwell's Meadow is what the locals call it, or sometimes the Old Camp. It was here that Sara Tidwell and her curious tribe built their cabins, at least according to Marie Hingerman (and once, when I asked Bill Dean, he agreed this was the place . . . although he didn't seem interested in continuing the conversation, which struck me at the time as a bit odd). I stood there for a moment, looking down at the north end of Dark Score. The water was glassy and calm, still candy-colored in the afterglow of sunset, without a single ripple or a single small craft to be seen. The boat-people would all be down at the marina or at Warrington's Sunset Bar by now, I guessed, eating lobster rolls and drinking big mixed drinks. Later a few of them, buzzed on speed and martinis, would go bolting up and down the lake by moonlight. I wondered if I would be around to hear them. I thought there was a fair chance that by then I'd be on my way back to Derry, either terrified by what I'd found or disillusioned because I had found nothing at all. ‘You funny little man, said Strickland.' I didn't know I was going to speak until the words were out of my mouth, and why those words in particular I had no idea. I remembered my dream of Jo under the bed and shuddered. A mosquito whined in my ear. I slapped it and walked on. In the end, my arrival at the head of the driveway was almost too perfectly timed, the sense of having re-entered my dream almost too complete. Even the balloons tied to the SARA LAUGHS sign (one white and one blue, both with WELCOME BACK MIKE! carefully printed on them in black ink) and floating against the ever-darkening backdrop of the trees seemed to intensify the d? ¦j? ¤ vu I had quite deliberately induced, for no two dreams are exactly the same, are they? Things conceived by minds and made by hands can never be quite the same, even when they try their best to be identical, because we're never the same from day to day or even moment to moment. I walked to the sign, feeling the mystery of this place at twilight. I squeezed down on the board, feeling its rough reality, and then I ran the ball of my thumb over the letters, daring the splinters and reading with my skin like a blind man reading braille: S and A and R and A; L and A and U and G and H and S. The driveway had been cleared of fallen needles and blown-down branches, but Dark Score glimmered a fading rose just as it had in my dreams, and the sprawled hulk of the house was the same. Bill had thoughtfully left the light over the back stoop burning, and the sunflowers growing through the boards had long since been cut down, but everything else was the same. I looked overhead, at the slot of sky over the lane. Nothing . . . I waited . . . and nothing . . . waiting still . . . and then there it was, right where the center of my gaze had been trained. At one moment there was only the fading sky (with indigo just starting to rise up from the edges like an infusion of ink), and at the next Venus was glowing there, bright and steady. People talk about watching the stars come out, and I suppose some people do, but I think that was the only time in my life that I actually saw one appear. I wished on it, too, but this time it was real time, and I did not wish for Jo. ‘Help me,' I said, looking at the star. I would have said more, but I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what kind of help I needed. That's enough, a voice in my mind said uneasily. That's enough, now. Go on back and get your car. Except that wasn't the plan. The plan was to go down the driveway, just as I had in the final dream, the nightmare. The plan was to prove to myself that there was no shroud-wrapped monster lurking in the shadows of the big old log house down there. The plan was pretty much based on that bit of New Age wisdom which says the word ‘fear' stands for Face Everything And Recover. But, as I stood there and looked down at that spark of porch light (it looked very small in the growing darkness), it occurred to me that there's another bit of wisdom, one not quite so good-morning-starshine, which suggests fear is actually an acronym for Fuck Everything And Run. Standing there by myself in the woods as the light left the sky, that seemed like the smarter interpretation, no two ways about it. I looked down and was a little amused to see that I had taken one of the balloons untied it without even noticing as I thought things over. It floated serenely up from my hand at the end of its string, the words printed on it now impossible to read in the growing dark. Maybe it's all moot, anyway; maybe I won't be able to move. Maybe that old devil writer's walk has got hold of me again, and I'll just stand here like a statue until someone comes along and hauls me away. But this was real time in the real world, and in the real world there was no such thing as writer's walk. I opened my hand. As the string I'd been holding floated free, I walked under the rising balloon and started down the driveway. Foot followed foot, pretty much as they had ever since I'd first learned this trick back in 1959. I went deeper and deeper into the clean but sour smell of pine, and once I caught myself taking an extra-big step, avoiding a fallen branch that had been in the dream but wasn't here in reality. My heart was still thudding hard, and sweat was still pouring out of me, oiling my skin and drawing mosquitoes. I raised a hand to brush the hair off my brow, then stopped, holding it splay-fingered out in front of my eyes. I put the other one next to it. Neither was marked; there wasn't even a shadow of scar from the cut I'd given myself while crawling around my bedroom during the ice storm. ‘I'm all right,' I said. ‘I'm all right.' You funny little man, said Strickland, a voice answered. It wasn't mine, wasn't Jo's; it was the UFO voice that had narrated my nightmare, the one which had driven me on even when I wanted to stop. The voice of some outsider. I started walking again. I was better than halfway down the driveway now. I had reached the point where, in the dream, I told the voice that I was afraid of Mrs. Danvers. ‘I'm afraid of Mrs. D.,' I said, trying the words aloud in the growing dark. ‘What if the bad old housekeeper's down there?' A loon cried on the lake, but the voice didn't answer. I suppose it didn't have to. There was no Mrs. Danvers, she was only a bag of bones in an old book, and the voice knew it. I began walking again. I passed the big pine that Jo had once banged into in our Jeep, trying to back up the driveway. How she had sworn! Like a sailor! I had managed to keep a straight face until she got to ‘Fuck a duck,' and then I'd lost it, leaning against the side of the Jeep with the heels of my hands pressed against my temples, howling until tears rolled down my cheeks, and Jo glaring hot blue sparks at me the whole time. I could see the mark about three feet up on the trunk of the tree, the white seeming to float above the dark bark in the gloom. It was just here that the unease which pervaded the other dreams had skewed into something far worse. Even before the shrouded thing had come bursting out of the house, I had felt something was all wrong, all twisted up; I had felt that somehow the house itself had gone insane. It was at this point, passing the old scarred pine, that I had wanted to run like the gingerbread man. I didn't feel that now. I was afraid, yes, but not in terror. There was nothing behind me, for one thing, no sound of slobbering breath. The worst thing a man was likely to come upon in these woods was an irritated moose. Or, I supposed, if he was really unlucky, a pissed-off bear. In the dream there had been a moon at least three quarters full, but there was no moon in the sky above me that night. Nor would there be; in glancing over the weather page in that morning's Derry News, I had noticed that the moon was new. Even the most powerful d? ¦j? ¤ vu is fragile, and at the thought of that moonless sky, mine broke. The sensation of reliving my nightmare departed so abruptly that I even wondered why I had done this, what I had hoped to prove or accomplish. Now I'd have to go all the way back down the dark lane to retrieve my car. All right, but I'd do it with a flashlight from the house. One of them would surely still be just inside the A series of jagged explosions ran themselves off on the far side of the lake, the last loud enough to echo against the hills. I stopped, drawing in a quick breath. Moments before, those unexpected bangs probably would have sent me running back up the driveway in a panic, but now I had only that brief, startled moment. It was firecrackers, of course, the last one the loudest one maybe an M-80. Tomorrow was the Fourth of July, and across the lake kids were celebrating early, as kids are wont to do. I walked on. The bushes still reached like hands, but they had been pruned back and their reach wasn't very threatening. I didn't have to worry about the power being out, either; I was now close enough to the back stoop to see moths fluttering around the light Bill Dean had left on for me. Even if the power had been out (in the western part of the state a lot of the lines are still above ground, and it goes out a lot), the gennie would have kicked in automatically. Yet I was awed by how much of my dream was actually here, even with the powerful sense of repetition of reliving departed. Jo's planters were where they'd always been, flanking the path which leads down to Sara's little lick of beach; I suppose Brenda Meserve had found them stacked in the cellar and had had one of her crew set them out again. Nothing was growing in them yet, but I suspected that stuff would be soon. And even without the moon of my dream, I could see the black square on the water, standing about fifty yards offshore. The swimming float. No oblong shape lying overturned in front of the stoop, though; no coffin. Still, my heart was beating hard again, and I think if more firecrackers had gone off on the Kashwakamak side of the lake just then, I might have screamed. You funny little man, said Strickland. Give me that, it's my dust-catcher. What if death drives us insane? What if we survive, but it drives us insane? What then? I had reached the point where, in my nightmare, the door banged open and that white shape came hurtling out with its wrapped arms upraised. I took one more step and then stopped, hearing the harsh sound of my respiration as I drew each breath down my throat and then pushed it back out over the dry floor of my tongue. There was no sense of d? ¦j? ¤ vu, but for a moment I thought the shape would appear anyway here in the real world, in real time. I stood waiting for it with my sweaty hands clenched. I drew in another dry breath, and this time I held it. The soft lap of water against the shore. A breeze that patted my face and rattled the bushes. A loon cried out on the lake; moths battered the stoop light. No shroud-monster threw open the door, and through the big windows to the left and right of the door, I could see nothing moving, white or otherwise. There was a note above the knob, probably from Bill, and that was it. I let out my breath in a rush and walked the rest of the way down the driveway to Sara Laughs. The note was indeed from Bill Dean. It said that Brenda had done some shopping for me; the supermarket receipt was on the kitchen table, and I would find the pantry well stocked with canned goods. She'd gone easy with the perishables, but there was milk, butter, half-and-half, and hamburger, that staple of single-guy cuisine. I will see you next Mon., Bill had written. If I had my druthers I'd be here to say hello in person but the good wife says it's our turn to do the holiday trotting and so we are going down to Virginia (hot!!) to spend the 4th with her sister. If you need anything or run into problems . . . He had jotted his sister-in-law's phone number in Virginia as well as Butch Wiggins's number in town, which locals just call ‘the TR,' as in ‘Me and mother got tired of Bethel and moved our trailer over to the TR.' There were other numbers, as well the plumber, the electrician, Brenda Meserve, even the TV guy over in Harrison who had repositioned the DSS dish for maximum reception. Bill was taking no chances. I turned the note over, imagining a final P.S.: Say, Mike, if nuclear war should break out before me and Yvette get back from Virginia Something moved behind me. I whirled on my heels, the note dropping from my hand. It fluttered to the boards of the back stoop like a larger, whiter version of the moths banging the bulb overhead. In that instant I was sure it would be the shroud-thing, an insane revenant in my wife's decaying body, Give me my dust-catcher, give it to me, how dare you come down here and disturb my rest, how dam you come to Manderley again, and now that you're here, how will you ever get away? Into the mystery with you, you silly little man. Into the mystery with you. Nothing there. It had just been the breeze again, stirring the bushes around a little . . . except I had felt no breeze against my sweaty skin, not that time. ‘Well it must have been, there's nothing there,' I said. The sound of your voice when you're alone can be either scary or reassuring. That time it was the latter. I bent over, picked up Bill's note, and stuffed it into my back pocket. Then I rummaged out my keyring. I stood under the stoop light in the big, swooping shadows of the light-struck moths, picking through my keys until I found the one I wanted. It had a funny disused look, and as I rubbed my thumb along its serrated edge, I wondered again why I hadn't come down here except for a couple of quick broad daylight errands in all the months and years since Jo had died. Surely if she had been alive, she would have insisted But then a peculiar realization came to me: it wasn't just a matter of since Jo died. It was easy to think of it that way never once during my six weeks on Key Largo had I thought of it any other way but now, actually standing here in the shadows of the dancing moths (it was like standing under some weird organic disco ball) and listening to the loons out on the lake, I remembered that although Johanna had died in August of 1994, she had died in Derry. It had been miserably hot in the city . . . so why had we been there? Why hadn't we been sitting out on our shady deck on the lake side of the house, drinking iced tea in our bathing suits, watching the boats go back and forth and commenting on the form of the various water-skiers? What had she been doing in that damned Rite Aid parking lot to begin with, when during any other August we would have been miles from there? Nor was that all. We usually stayed at Sara until the end of September it was a peaceful, pretty time, as warm as summer. But in '93 we'd left with August only a week gone. I knew, because I could remember Johanna going to New York with me later that month, some kind of publishing deal and the usual attendant publicity crap. It had been dog-hot in Manhattan, the hydrants spraying in the East Village and the uptown streets sizzling. On one night of that trip we'd seen The Phantom of the Opera. Near the end Jo had leaned over to me and whispered, ‘Oh fuck! The Phantom is snivelling again!' I had spent the rest of the show trying to keep from bursting into wild peals of laughter. Jo could be evil that way. Why had she come with me that August? Jo didn't like New York even in April or October, when it's sort of pretty. I didn't know. I couldn't remember. All I was sure of was' that she had never been back to Sara Laughs after early August of 1993 . . . and before long I wasn't even sure of that. I slipped the key into the lock and turned it. I'd go inside, flip on the kitchen overheads, grab a flashlight, and go back for the car. If I didn't, some drunk guy with a cottage at the far south end of the lane would come in too fast, rear-end my Chevy, and sue me for a billion dollars. The house had been aired out and didn't smell a bit musty; instead of still, stale air, there was a faint and pleasing aroma of pine. I reached for the light inside the door, and then, somewhere in the blackness of the house, a child began to sob. My hand froze where it was and my flesh went cold. I didn't panic, exactly, but all rational thought left my mind. It was weeping, a child's weeping, but I hadn't a clue as to where it was coming from. Then it began to fade. Not to grow softer but to fade, as if someone had picked that kid up and was carrying it away down some long corridor. . . not that any such corridor existed in Sara Laughs. Even the one running through the middle of the house, connecting the central section to the two wings, isn't really long. Fading . . . faded . . . almost gone. I stood in the dark with my cold skin crawling and my hand on the lightswitch. Part of me wanted to boogie, to just go flying out of there as fast as my little legs could carry me, running like the gingerbread man. Another part, however the rational part was already reasserting itself. I flicked the switch, the part that wanted to run saying forget it, it won't work, it's the dream, stupid, it's your dream coming true. But it did work. The foyer light came on in a shadow-dispelling rush, revealing Jo's lumpy little pottery collection to the left and the bookcase to the right, stuff I hadn't looked at in four years or more, but still here and still the same. On a middle shelf of the bookcase I could see the three early Elmore Leonard novels Swag, The Big Bounce, and Mr. Majestyk that I had put aside against a spell of rainy weather; you have to be ready for rain when you're at camp. Without a good book, even two days of rain in the woods can be enough to drive you bonkers. There was a final whisper of weeping, then silence. In it, I could hear ticking from the kitchen. The clock by the stove, one of Jo's rare lapses into bad taste, is Felix the Cat with big eyes that shift from side to side as his pendulum tail flicks back and forth. I think it's been in every cheap horror movie ever made. ‘Who's here?' I called. I took a step toward the kitchen, just a dim space floating beyond the foyer, then stopped. In the dark the house was a cavern. The sound of the weeping could have come from anywhere. Including my own imagination. ‘Is someone here?' No answer . . . but I didn't think the sound had been in my head. If it had been, writer's block was the least of my worries. Standing on the bookcase to the left of the Elmore Leonards was a long-barrelled flashlight, the kind that holds eight D-cells and will temporarily blind you if someone shines it directly into your eyes. I grasped it, and until it nearly slipped through my hand I hadn't really realized how heavily I was sweating, or how scared I was. I juggled it, heart beating hard, half-expecting that creepy sobbing to begin again, half-expecting the shroud-thing to come floating out of the black living room with its shapeless arms raised; some old hack of a politician back from the grave and ready to give it another shot. Vote the straight Resurrection ticket, brethren, and you will be saved. I got control of the light and turned it on. It shot a bright straight beam into the living room, picking out the moosehead over the fieldstone fireplace; it shone in the head's glass eyes like two lights burning under water. I saw the old cane-and-bamboo chairs; the old couch; the scarred dining-room table you had to balance by shimming one leg with a folded playing card or a couple of beer coasters; I saw no ghosts; I decided this was a seriously fucked-up carnival just the same. In the words of the immortal Cole Porter, let's call the whole thing off. If I headed east as soon as I got back to my car, I could be in Derry by midnight. Sleeping in my own bed. I turned out the foyer light and stood with the flash drawing its line across the dark. I listened to the tick of that stupid cat-clock, which Bill must have set going, and to the familiar chugging cycle of the refrigerator. As I listened to them, I realized that I had never expected to hear either sound again. As for the crying . . . Had there been crying? Had there really? Yes. Crying or something. Just what now seemed moot. What seemed germane was that coming here had been a dangerous idea and a stupid course of action for a man who has taught his mind to misbehave. As I stood in the foyer with no light but the flash and the glow falling in the windows from the bulb over the back stoop, I realized that the line between what I knew was real and what I knew was only my imagination had pretty much disappeared. I left the house, checked to make sure the door was locked, and walked back up the driveway, swinging the flashlight beam from side to side like a pendulum like the tail of old Felix the Krazy Kat in the kitchen. It occurred to me, as I struck north along the lane, that I would have to make up some sort of story for Bill Dean. It wouldn't do to say, ‘Well, Bill, I got down there and heard a kid bawling in my locked house, and it scared me so bad I turned into the gingerbread man and ran back to Derry. I'll send you the flashlight I took; put it back on the shelf next to the paperbacks, would you?' That wasn't ‘any good because the story would get around and people would say, ‘Not surprised. Wrote too many books, probably. Work like that has got to soften a man's head. Now he's scared of his own shadow. Occupational hazard.' Even if I never came down here again in my life, I didn't want to leave people on the TR with that opinion of me, that half-contemptuous, see-what-you-get-for-thinking-too-much attitude. It's one a lot of folks seem to have about people who live by their imaginations. I'd tell Bill I got sick. In a way it was true. Or no . . . better to tell him someone else got sick . . . a friend . . . someone in Derry I'd been seeing . . . a lady-friend, perhaps. ‘Bill, this friend of mine, this lady-friend of mine got sick, you see, and so . . . ‘ I stopped suddenly, the light shining on the front of my car. I had walked the mile in the dark without noticing many of the sounds in the woods, and dismissing even the bigger of them as deer settling down for the night. I hadn't turned around to see if the shroud-thing (or maybe some spectral crying child) was following me. I had gotten involved in making up a story and then embellishing it, doing it in my head instead of on paper this time but going down all the same well-known paths. I had gotten so involved that I had neglected to be afraid. My heartbeat was back to normal, the sweat was drying on my skin, and the mosquitoes had stopped whining in my ears. And as I stood there, a thought occurred to me. It was as if my mind had been waiting patiently for me to calm down enough so it could remind me of some essential fact. The pipes. Bill had gotten my go-ahead to replace most of the old stuff, and the plumber had done so. Very recently he'd done so. ‘Air in the pipes,' I said, running the beam of the eight-cell flashlight over the grille of my Chevrolet. ‘That's what I heard.' I waited to see if the deeper part of my mind would call this a stupid, rationalizing lie. It didn't . . . because, I suppose, it realized it could be true. Airy pipes can sound like people talking, dogs barking, or children crying. Perhaps the plumber had bled them and the sound had been something else . . . but perhaps he hadn't. The question was whether or not I was going to jump in my car, back two tenths of a mile to the highway, and then return to Derry, all on the basis of a sound I had heard for ten seconds (maybe only five), and while in an excited, stressful state of mind. I decided the answer was no. It might take only one more peculiar thing to turn me around probably gibbering like a character on Tales from the Crypt but the sound I'd heard in the foyer wasn't enough. Not when making a go of it at Sara Laughs might mean so much. I hear voices in my head, and have for as long as I can remember. I don't know if that's part of the necessary equipment for being a writer or not; I've never asked another one. I never felt the need to, because I know all the voices I hear are versions of me. Still, they often seem like very real versions of other people, and none is more real to me-or more familiar than Jo's voice. Now that voice came, sounding interested, amused in an ironic but gentle way . . . and approving. Going to fight, Mike? ‘Yeah,' I said, standing there in the dark and picking out gleams of chrome with my flashlight. ‘Think so, babe.' Well, then that's all right, isn't it? Yes. It was. I got into my car, started it up, and drove slowly down the lane. And when I got to the driveway, I turned in. There was no crying the second time I entered the house. I walked slowly through the downstairs, keeping the flashlight in my hand until I had turned on every light I could find; if there were people still boating on the north end of the lake, old Sara probably looked like some weird Spielbergian flying saucer hovering above them. I think houses live their own lives along a time-stream that's different from the ones upon which their owners float, one that's slower. In a house, especially an old one, the past is closer. In my life Johanna had been dead nearly four years, but to Sara, she was much nearer than that. It wasn't until I was actually inside, with all the lights on and the flash returned to its spot on the bookshelf, that I realized how much I had been dreading my arrival. Of having my grief reawakened by signs of Johanna's interrupted life. A book with a corner turned down on the table at one end of the sofa, where Jo had liked to recline in her nightgown, reading and eating plums; the cardboard cannister of Quaker Oats, which was all she ever wanted for breakfast, on a shelf in the pantry; her old green robe hung on the back of the bathroom door in the south wing, which Bill Dean still called ‘the new wing,' although it had been built before we ever saw Sara Laughs. Brenda Meserve had done a good job a humane job-of removing these signs and signals, but she couldn't get them all. Jo's hardcover set of Sayers's Peter Wimsey novels still held pride of place at the center of the living-room bookcase. Jo had always called the moosehead over the fireplace Bunter, and once, for no reason I could remember (certainly it seemed a very un-Bunterlike accessory), she had hung a bell around the moose's hairy neck. It hung there still, on a red velvet ribbon. Mrs. Meserve might have puzzled over that bell, wondering whether to leave it up or take it down, not knowing that when Jo and I made love on the living-room couch (and yes, we were often overcome there), we referred to the act as ‘ringing Bunter's bell.' Brenda Meserve had done her best, but any good marriage is secret territory, a necessary white space on society's map. What others don't know about it is what makes it yours. I walked around, touching things, looking at things, seeing them new. Jo seemed everywhere to me, and after a little while I dropped into one of the old cane chairs in front of the TV. The cushion wheezed under me, and I could hear Jo saying, ‘Well excuse yourself, Michael!' I put my face in my hands and cried. I suppose it was the last of my mourning, but that made it no easier to bear. I cried until I thought something inside me would break if I didn't stop. When it finally let me go, my face was drenched, I had the hiccups, and I thought I had never felt so tired in my life. I felt strained all over my body partly from the walking I'd done, I suppose, but mostly just from the tension of getting here . . . and deciding to stay here. To fight. That weird phantom crying I'd heard when I first stepped into the place, although it seemed very distant now, hadn't helped. I washed my face at the kitchen sink, rubbing away the tears with the heels of my hands and clearing my clogged nose. Then I carried my suitcases down to the guest bedroom in the north wing. I had no intention of sleeping in the south wing, in the master bedroom where I had last slept with Jo. That was a choice Brenda Meserve had foreseen. There was a bouquet of fresh wildflowers on the bureau, and a card: WELCOME BACK, MR. NOONAN. If I hadn't been emotionally exhausted, I suppose looking at that message, in Mrs. Meserve's spiky copperplate handwriting, would have brought on another fit of the weeps. I put my face in the flowers and breathed deeply. They smelled good, like sunshine. Then I took off my clothes, leaving them where they dropped, and turned back the coverlet on the bed. Fresh sheets, fresh pillowcases; same old Noonan sliding between the former and dropping his head onto the latter. I lay there with the bedside lamp on, looking up at the shadows on the ceiling, almost unable to believe I was in this place and this bed. There had been no shroud-thing to greet me, of course . . . but I had an idea it might well find me in my dreams. Sometimes for me, at least there's a transitional bump between waking and sleeping. Not that night. I slipped away without knowing it, and woke the next morning with sunlight shining in through the window and the bedside lamp still on. There had been no dreams that I could remember, only a vague sensation that I had awakened sometime briefly in the night and heard a bell ringing, very thin and far away.